Showing posts with label Shamanic Initiation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Shamanic Initiation. Show all posts

Monday, July 15, 2013

THE END OF MY INITIATION AS A SHAMAN




When I first moved into my apartment in Yakima, I buried my extra house key beside a post in the cyclone fence at the east edge of the crushed gravel parking lot.  After a few years, in which I had not  needed the spare key, I decided to dig it up, just to check it.  I dug and dug, but never found it.

On July 19, 2013, I experienced a heart attack while walking around Myron Lake.  I had been drinking beer for breakfast for weeks, and stuffing myself with corn chips, and I could feel the congestion in my chest cavity.  The heart attack was severe enough to scare me, but I was able to control it with my yoga breathing and energy manipulations.  For a few days, my chest was in strong discomfort, with pinging chest pains.  After a while, I began to realize another aspect to these energies.  I could sense the presence of Marilyn Monroe.

Since I have no medical coverage, I continued my gem elixir and yoga treatments and went on about my business.  The chest pains continued.  Soon, they became more and more pronounced, until they began to seem like messages in Morse Code.  I knew it was MM teasing me.

On March 3, I had another attack.  This time, I could feel the pain going up my aorta.  I could see into my chest, where there was a blue glow all around the area of the aorta.  This was the fifth anniversary of my mother’s death.  I began to sense a purpose to these attacks. 

My mother came to visit me, in company with Marilyn Monroe.  She had grown into her identity with Queen Nefertiti, my Master Teacher.  Together, they showed me the secret of my very much unexpected birth.

At sixteen years old, my mother, first of three children, had seduced her father and became with child.  Later, with the birth of this first child, her uterus had been rendered inoperative.  Years later, she had married my father, and for six years, they were childless.  And then I came along.  After this birth, the uterus was removed.

As a child, I had received hints about the existence of my older brother, but it wasn’t until just a few years ago that I began to understand that I wasn’t her only offspring.  By that time, I was two decades into my Initiation as a Shaman, and living in Yakima.

The visit from the spirit of my mother turned out to be the beginning of the end of my Initiation as a Shaman.  It had been twenty two years and 99 days since the beginning on the day after Xmas in 1990.

A few days passed, and I was outside checking the yard, when I looked down to the dirt of the alley, a few feet from my blossoming stand of hollyhocks.

“That’s my house key!” I said.  I took it from its little Ziploc and checked it in the door.  It worked.  I think this was the first time Marilyn Monroe had dematerialized an object for me.

Shortly after that experience, I decided to dig up the Master Crystal and some other stones used by Jesus and Nefertiti as they worked to realize the agenda we had cooked up in ancient Egypt, concerning the birth and rebirth of Jesus.  The soul of Jesus had been modeled after that of Peta Amen Apt, priest of the High Temple in Ancient Egypt.  In the first days of my Initiation as a Shaman, they had pointed out his name in a footnote in the Egyptian Book of the Dead.  Peta worked with me for several years, and eventually broke my typewriter.

As my Initiation had been dragging along for so many years, without any sense that I was acquiring the powers expected of a ‘real’ Shaman (as opposed to the current flood of Shamanic Practitioners –no slight intended…), I began to suspect that the Master Crystal was key to an agenda that was being concealed from me.  After the experiences which began with the attempted assassination of Congresswoman Gabby Giffords in January 2011, in which I played a key role, and was introduced to the secrets of the human sacrifice as it is practiced today, I came to a time when I began to experience the creation of my Nagual.

The Nagual, or ‘double’, is a projection from the yoni (loin area) of Shamans of South and Central America.  It is often a Jaguar.  My Nagual was actually Jesus, who appeared as the little black dog Xolotl, Lord of the Underworld, who immediately morphed into a giant Anaconda, which I was able to watch as he slithered out into the world and traveled toward Seattle, and then south, and then all over the place, leaving a trail of nationally televised disasters and assassinations.   By this time it had become apparent to me that I had been expected to groom Jesus for his return in the Second Coming.  I had been shown the symbol of a cross, with not one but two crosspieces.  I termed this the Double Cross.

By this time I had become thoroughly convinced that my youthful distaste for and distrust of Jesus and the Christian religion had been entirely correct.  I was not willing to be party to the sorts of lies and deceptions, heinous practices and ruinations of the living planet, which I had experienced to be at the core of this agenda.  It had become obvious that I had evolved, spiritually, along with the planet, but that my spirits had not.  So I had buried the Master Crystal and others, in the sacred grove of the garden at the west edge of the parking lot.  Again, I dug and dug, but the crystals were no longer there.  Then other things began to disappear.

Over the years since the Giffords massacre, I had been having intense battles with Jesus.  I found I was able to actually engage him in combat, and was able to prevail.  His method of dealing with me over the years had so infuriated me, that I had successively grown stronger and stronger, until his provocations finally succeeded in crystallizing the totality of the energies of my own spirit.  It took me many years to finally break through the sociological and cultural conditioning that made me feel I needed to be somehow subservient to the Great Holy Ones.  After each battle, I would recover, go on with my days, and have some remorse.  I would rationalize that it was possible to co-exist with this agenda which was so anathema to me; that I should behave myself and not fly off the handle….  And it was settled.  And then my spirit would rise up and say, “No Way!”

Until finally, the Initiation had ended.  It took me a few months to test the situation, but it seems to have actually morphed into what I call my “Apprenticeship”.  I  am now the apprentice of the Medicine Energies which I have built up in my yard and apartment during the seven years I’ve lived here.  My Medicine has spread from my apartment to the others in the fourplex, and to the neighbors.  We have become a small community.  Plants from my garden are now the beginnings of gardens for each of the other tenants, and the neighbors.  Friendships have formed, and each tenant has found new interests and a revitalized life.

Meanwhile, I am still tracking the activities of my Nagual.  The first really significant feat that the Nagual has accomplished is the replacement of the Pope of the Catholic Church with a new Pope, Francis, who is known as a champion of the poor and downtrodden.  At first, I was deeply annoyed that after giving my life to this aborted ploy to bring the Jesus back to life, all he could manage to do was change the Pope.  But I mellowed out, after some time.

The second feat that he has accomplished is more to my liking.  As we have our roots in ancient Egypt, I was very pleased that he was able to bring a change to the elected government in Egypt, and remove the heavy-handed Morsi government, with its Islamist agenda.  While I have not had the opportunity during my Initiation to do much work with individuals, it recently occurred to me that I would be able to exert some power over the Gods of the Abrahamic Religions, and by starting at the top, begin to bring some changes to the way these religions treat this magical planet we all share, which is the mother and birthplace of the Gods themselves.

The past few months have given me some hope that I will be able to rehabilitate at least some aspects of my life.  I am actually enjoying the process of losing my teeth as I age.



Monday, October 29, 2012

MY DRAGON GETS WINGS


10.27.12 Saturday

So I’m in way over my head again.  Both Jesus and Marilyn Monroe are back with me.  I don’t really know if I ever expected that my Ceremony would rid me of MM.  But she did disappear for a while.  Yesterday she beeped the door chime on my truck; just once.  Even the door chime ding has a varied tonality when she beeps it!  Sometimes it’s clumsy and tenuous.  Sometimes it sends chills up my spine.  Sometimes it scares me, and sometimes it makes me furious.  Yesterday, it was so matter-of-fact, I just noted it and kept driving.  She didn’t appear in my dreams.  But all morning I could feel her presence.

I was watching UP with Chris Hayes on MSNBC early this morning, and switching to CBS during commercials.  There she was, all blonde and in bed with white sheets pulled up to her neck, looking divine.  While she was gone, she appeared in a credit card commercial as a work of art in a gallery, looking vapid and lost.  Even on TV she manages to communicate.  It was a real treat, in the early years of my Initiation as a Shaman, to watch her movies with her on the TV.  She would tell me things about what was going on.  She would manipulate her image to make her jaw look huge, or to make a long wrinkle of fat on her back.  Now I can’t stand to see her! 

One of the ways we learn to recognize the true nature of reality is when Spirit is present and active.  She unites various levels of reality, space and time and ‘mood’ because of the expanded and augmented nature of her divinity, --her Spirit, her Goddess Nature, her nature as an ALLY. 

On Tuesday, the 23rd, I was doing yoga in the morning, and I could feel Jesus with me.  As I was doing a heart-opener with a Chi Mudra twist, he muttered deep within me, “I Die!”  Since then he has remained out of my consciousness.  The next day, the moon cycle shifted, and the rains came.  There is a feeling that comes with the rain, which connects it with the Moods of the Moon.  This rain has been a nasty rain.  Mostly a drizzle, it’s been dark, dank, and cold.  My teeth began to hurt.  This was my body relating to the energy drain from Jesus, deep within me.  Even my stool was affected.  The spirits eat it for its energy.  (Google Tlazolteotl, Goddess of Love and Excrement.  She was with me for a while in ’06.  She spoke through me by forcing my mouth into an extreme bucktooth configuration….  She is an aspect of Marilyn Monroe.)  Then I got a message from “Reynard”.

Reynard is the Werewolf Master of the Montana Flood region of Eastern Washington.  I first met him in Ellensburg.  He set the witches to attack me so as to drive me out of town, and I ended up here in Yakima.  Reynard is a red-head.  He showed up as the son of Frank, next door in apt. #3, early this summer, with a shit-load of trouble.  After a couple of Shamanic treatments on him and his Native girlfriend, things smoothed out and they found a house a few blocks away.  He helped me to see the ‘lines of force in the universe’ which would allow me to gain access to the spirit ‘handles’ on the un-evolved souls who inhabit this region.  There are many mythical and fairie folk who live in human form, but never migrate to the urban areas.  They are creatures of the earth, and have a very special energy vibe.  Meeting with them was one of the main reasons I was moved here to Yakima.  Their energies were certainly a shock to my system!

As the rains broke for a while, I was able to install a small shipping pallet I had scavenged from the hops warehouses on my way home from the coffee shop a few mornings ago.  It fit nicely at the alley edge of my compost heap.  So I was able to rake the three years of compost onto some cardboard, set in the pallet and bolster it with stones, and refill the space with my beautiful, fully transformed compost.  Truly a prize!  I love it when the vortexes tell me where to work in the yard.  I always start with the rake, and clean the area before I enter, and things flow smoothly from there.  Otherwise, they don’t flow at all.  The garden rake is the Shaman’s key to the earth, as the broom is the Witch’s key to flight.

My yoga dance with Jesus led to a vision of the male genitals, which was transferred to the new rattle I made to use with the chakra board.  As I gave myself a chakra treatment on Thursday, I was directed to sit in the Ting.  (“Ting” is the Chinese word for cauldron, the name of I Ching hexagram #50, the most favorable in the book.  It is the name I have given to the Buddha Vortex, after Buddha left with Jesus and Quetzalcoatl to become Xoxolotl, my Anaconda Nagual, Lord of the Underworld.)   As I sat there, I went into trance, and my genitals opened to send my DRAGON into the world.  He is no longer an Anaconda.  He has morphed into a dragon, and while I was being amazed at this vision, he sprouted his wings!  My genitals exploded, and I burst out in a ‘ROARRR’.

As I sat there, amazed, he told me his name is “TEOTL”  Nahuatl for “God”.  At the same time, I was getting a message from the yoga mat on the floor in front of the Ting.  It features a large black circle, or Bindu, center of the universe.  The bindu was fluctuating in a sort of Morse Code.  It was a way to alert me to the fact that I should time my Full Moon ceremony to the Dark Crescent, three days after Full.  And just at that moment, I repeated my Death Rattle.  While Teo was emerging from my yoni, I was giving off a powerful noise from deep in my throat, which registered in some part of my consciousness as my death rattle.

I don’t know what’s going to happen next.  The moon is Full in two days.  I’ve lost track of what I’m supposed to do for Ceremony.  As I did my recapitulation this morning, it was clear that I have a duty.  In my role as Quetzalcoatl, a title I received years ago during my Initiation as a Shaman, it is my duty to put an end to the present (Christian) era.  It may be that this is happening as Jesus becomes my Nagual.  Or that could be just another Spirit mirage.  It seems I will wait until I feel that burning rage which shapes itself into a white-hot fury, to burn through meteorites, and I will know what to do as I’m doing it, as usual.